Naughty Swedish lessons

My blossoming Swedish skills haven't come without numerous Swedish mistakes, some of which are pretty boring and some of which are nearly disastrous.  And for some reason when I make a mistake in Swedish that ends up making everyone else giggle, the mistake word gets stuck in my head forever rather than teaching me a valuable language lesson.  Here are a few good ones so far:

• The word for "bullshit" in Swedish is tjurskit (tjur = bull and skit = shit).  Easy enough, right?  For some reason I've gotten stuck on saying tjuvskit, which is "thief shit." 
• A few weeks ago at the daycare where I've been interning I was playing with a little boy and wanted to tell him to try doing a somersault, which is a kullerbytta.  Instead I almost spat out the word knullbyta, which as I understand it is a fairly nasty way to say "sex change." 
• Just this week I had been talking to M about the word snopp, which is a very tame word for "penis."  It also unfortunately sounds very close to the word "snot" in my brain (snot is snor in Swedish, which is also close).  One young man at the daycare was in dire need of a nose wipe the other day and I came way too close to asking him if he wanted me to ta bort din snopp (take away your penis) instead of ta bort din snor (wipe your nose). 

I'm sure these won't be the last of my mistakes and luckily the worst ones have only been on the tip of my tongue instead of out loud where small children can be confused and/or mortified by them.  With that I'll leave you with another funny Swedish sign found by my friend Lis....Väg Assistans just means "road assistance," but the 14-year-old boy in me can't help imagining that this is some kind of traveling gynecological clinic, patrolling the streets of Sweden to help ladies in dire need of feminine supplies and lord knows what else....